I’m going to drop some knowledge on you right now if you are single and looking for love. Perhaps you are frustrated and have grown bitter towards love because every person you’ve gone out with has wound up to be a disappointment. You may even be at the point of throwing your hands up while declaring that you’re giving up on dating. It’s kind of like when you go out and drink too much and the next morning you swear you’re never drinking again. You know that’s not true. You’re getting hammered at the next opportunity that calls for it, regardless of how terrible you feel right now. The same goes for your love hangover.
If you are desperately looking for love and not finding it, the best advice I can give you is to stop looking. Maybe it’s time to take a break from the countless dating applications you’re on; Hinge, bumble, match.com, plenty of fish, tinder, shminder, you get the point.
People often say that love comes when you’re not looking for it. Maybe your problem is that you reek of desperation and it’s time to do some soul searching. Take all the energy you’re putting into looking for the one, and pour it into your passions, career, or hobbies instead. I believe when people are on a pursuit of doing what they love, they also find the right person of whom to love. Better yet, it may be during this pursuit of your passion that you stumble upon the perfect person who shares your same interests. For example, maybe you decide you’re finally going to take those tennis lessons you’ve always wanted to take. Then, next thing you know it, you happen to meet the most amazing guy who is also a beginner at the sport. Now, not only have you found a great guy to date, but you also have something in common to build your relationship on. The score might just end up being love-love.
However, this journey has to be genuine and honest to who you are. Don’t just go signing up for every activity under the sun in hopes you’ll find the perfect bachelor; because then your relationship will be built on a lie. If your favorite food is fried chicken, don’t go to a vegan food fair hoping to find love; you’ll just end up being miserable eating quinoa with your boyfriend while sneaking off to KFC every night. Just be true to who you are and everything will fall into place. If you change your focus to following your heart, you may find in turn that the man of your dreams will also be following after your heart.
That’s all for now. Stay tuned…