I recently had a great opportunity to be on Elite Daily's new talk show that they are launching in October. I will post the link on my website once it's uploaded. I was brought on the show to talk about The Way We Met and weigh in on what seems to be the best places to find love. Since I've now read thousands of meet-cute stories from couples of all ages, demographics, backgrounds, and races, it's become clear to me that the research I've gathered draws towards specific trends. Since the Elite Daily segment will be cut down and edited, only a fraction of my pointers will be broadcasted on the show. Therefore, I wanted to take the time to to share with you guys a complete list of all the best places and ways to meet that special someone.
1) Doing the same things.... WITH A DIFFERENT ATTITUDE.
Let's face it, our generation is glued to their Iphones; checking instagram, looking at snap-chat, and texting the same people we text every day of our lives. The truth is, if you actually glance up, you'll see there is a whole world happening around you and if you participate, you might be shocked at how your life changes. Many of the story submissions I receive come from couples who met in ways that were nothing out of the ordinary; on trains, standing in line at CVS, scanning the isles of a grocery store, or waiting at the apple store to have their phone fixed. One couple even met a stop-light, rolling down their windows to say hello and then exchanging numbers before the light turned green! The only difference that occurred on the day these people met the love of their life while doing the same routines, is that they decided to be present. It's amazing how the universe responds to you when you set out with a positive attitude. So the next time you're out running errands, put your phone away. Smile at someone in line or buy the cute stranger standing behind you his/her coffee. Surely they will have to come thank you for it, which will start a conversation. Get creative! Don't just assume that today is the same as every other day, because today can be exactly what you chose for it to be. So chose to be bold, offer someone a compliment, take a risk, and be open to possibilities. You'll be shocked to see how magical the outcome can be.
2) Try Something New
Yes, I know this is completely contradictory to my last suggestion, but they are both equally effective ways to meet someone. Sometimes we have to take ourselves out of our comfort zones to meet new people. Perhaps there is an activity you've been wanting to try forever that you keep talking about but never take action. It could be a cooking class, guitar lessons, or that new spinning studio that just opened. When we immerse ourselves into new activities, we build character. One of my favorite quotes is from the movie Into The Wild, (If you haven't seen it, you need to immediately) which says, "the core of man's spirit comes from new experiences." New experiences change us, challenge us, and make us better, more self-aware individuals. Also, the best part about trying something new is the opportunity to meet new people that comes along with it. If nothing more, maybe your new hobby becomes something that makes you a more interesting person and gives you something exciting to talk about on your next date. New experiences expose us to new networks of people who also have networks of people. Your soul mate might just be a friend of the friend you just made in Improv class.
3) Do some good
There are so many ways to be charitable and to get involved while helping others. Helping others has a way of in turn helping and healing yourself. For example, maybe you decide to commit to the goal of running a 5K (you could even chose a race where the admission fee goes towards a cause you're really passionate about). Anytime you put yourself in a situation where a large community comes together, you are increasing your odds of meeting someone new. Also, when people set out to help others or to achieve a goal, they are often exposing their most vulnerable self. This is why it's an optimal time to form new bonds. Accomplishing something like finishing a race builds character individually, but more importantly, requires the support of those around you. There is something about all being in it together that creates camaraderie. So, maybe instead of going on a spring break trip to Mexico with all of your friends to binge drink for 7 days, as fun as that can be, chose to donate your time to something more charitable like habitat for humanity. I guarantee you that you will leave the trip with new friendships and relationships that are built on a much stronger foundation than the friends you would have made at Senor Frogs. As a result, the likelihood of you staying in touch and maintaining lasting relationships after the trip is much greater. Another great suggestion, check out the November Project. It's a free outdoor fitness community that meets once a week in cities all over the U.S. To see if they are available in your city, check outhttp://november-project.com/
4) Online Dating
So I can't leave out online dating because the reality is that one out of three married couples meet online. If you are going to resort to use your computer or cell phone to find love, than at least take into account the ways to be more successful at it. Treat online dating as an introductory service. In other words, don't spend too much time texting with someone before meeting them in person. The best way to gauge if you have a real connection is to meet face to face (obviously in a public place where you feel safe.) Too often, people meet someone online who they perceive to be perfect and everything they are looking for on paper. However, upon meeting in person they often find themselves disappointed when the connection just isn't there. Well the honest truth is that most of the time people end up with a partner that is the exact opposite of whom they envisioned they'd end up with. There is an unexplainable spark and chemistry between two people that can only be assessed in person. So don't waste your time trying to type the perfect text message because none of that will ultimately change your fate. You won't have perfect responses in person, so just be yourself. Why would you want to be with someone who you weren't your real self with anyways? So my best advice is to just speed up the process and skip to grabbing a drink or a cup of coffee. That way you can decide if there is even a connection there worth pursuing.